Daddy will always love Mommy
by Black-servant
Summary: Kyoya is feeling absolutely miserable after he offered Haruhi to pay off her dept with her body. He can't believe that he really did it all because he wanted Tamaki to notice him. Now he is trying to think what he should do. Would it be best if he quit the host club?


Hi, this is my second Ouran high school host club. I hope you like it!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Ouran high school host club or anyt of its characters. They belong to Bisco Hatori.

**Warnings: **This story contains malexmale realationship and the characters are more or less OOC. Also like all of my stories this will contain fluff and lovey dovey moments.

**Pairings: **Tamaki x Kyoya and hints of Mori x Honey and Hikaru x Kaoru

**Daddy will always love Mommy**

written by Black-servant

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Kyoya sat on the floor leaning against his king sized bed feeling absolutely miserable. The room was dark and the whole manor was quiet because the young Ootori had ordered all of the servants to get out of the house and leave him alone when he had arrived home. His father and brothers was on some business trip and his sister was out with friends so he was all alone and now he could drop all his painful masks.

Kyoya sat on his bedroom floor motionless. He had been sitting on that same position almost an hour. His school bag lay in the corner obviously thrown there with anger. Kyoya was sad and angry at himself.

Kyoya stared at his floor without really seeing it. He was replaying this day's events in his mind again, again and again. How he had offered Haruhi to repay her depth with her body and then Tamaki finding them. Tamaki hadn't said a word and he didn't even look at Kyoya nor try to stop him as he fled from the room. The hurt and rage Kyoya had seen in Tamaki's eyes almost had made him cry right there in front of Tamaki and Haruhi but he had managed to keep his tears at bay until he had escaped the room. _"I should've just given up… I knew even before that that he was in love with her. I mean, you should practically be blind to not to see that... But I still had to try…try if he would stop caring about her after that. How could I even think of doing something like that to her…? I'm the worst, she really didn't deserve that and I'm sure that I managed to scare her pretty badly. I'm an idiot; I only managed to make him think that I'm some kind of a monster or something like that… I was just so desperate that I didn't think clearly… so desperate for him to finally see me instead of Haruhi…" _Kyoya hung his head even lower and the tears found their way to his eyes and there to his cheeks. One quivering sob released all of Kyoya's anguish and he cried like he had never before: it just hurt so much. Tamaki was everything to him and he loved him and would always love even if his feelings weren't returned. _"WHY?! Why for god's sake did I have to fall in love with him… and why so hard…? I would be willing to give up everything for him. The very moment I met him I have secretly organized my life so that we could be together… I really wonder what made me even thought that he would ever even consider me as anything more than just a friend… and now I'm not even that. What a pathetic excuse I am: Kyoya Ootori the third son and now the leader of the Ootori medical even though my father doesn't now about that yet. And now I'm broken hearted after messing everything because I just had to try and win him over… make him look at me instead of her. What was I really thinking at that moment? How I ever thought that he would think of me like that? Well I know an answer to that: because he calls me mommy when he himself is daddy… Shit, shit, shit, shit! I shouldn't have ever gotten my hopes up! I'm just a normal idiot who made the mistake of falling in love…" _

Kyoya's whole body was shaking at the emotional burden and even though he furiously tried to wipe the tears away and stop sobbing it didn't really work. He looked horrible with his clothes all ruffled, cheeks swollen and red and his eyes bloodshot from all the crying. Kyoya wasn't sure how long he cried in the loneliness of his own room but when the tears finally stopped he got up and went to his bathroom to wash his face with cold water. After he had splashed some cold water to his face Kyoya slowly lifted his head to look at himself on the mirror. At that moment all the hate he had for himself because of his failures rose up and he smashed his fist into the mirror making it break into a thousands of little peaces. His breath was ragged as he stared at the now empty wall before him trying to calm himself down. After a moment he finally cooled down. He closed his eyes with a shaky sigh while he ran his left hand through his hair. Then he registered slight stinging in his right hand and he raised it to look at it. The glass had cut his skin and there where many little red cuts on his fist that were bleeding slightly. Kyoya kneeled down to get a bandage from the cabinet under the sink. He carefully bandaged his right hand as well as he could with just one hand and then he turned off the lights and went back to his bedroom. He was now much calmer and from the outside you wouldn't even know that something had happened to the cool boy.

Kyoya changed into his purple silk pyjamas and went to lie down on his elegant bed. The clock was only 7.30 pm but Kyoya was so exhausted that he thought it was best to get some sleep. His thoughts however weren't ready to give him the peace he would have needed. _"I need to do something. I don't think I can be anywhere near Tamaki or Haruhi after this and it's unlike that they'll even want to have anything to do with me anymore. I hate to see Tamaki fawning over her but I admit that she is a good girl I just don't like her myself… Well that's mostly because I'm jealous over Tamaki. I'm so stupid and I'm called genius. I'm far from that… I don't know what to do… It has been so hard in the host club lately because all I can see is Honey-sempai and Mori-sempai happily together and then there's Hikaru and Kaoru another pair blissfully in love and then there's Tamaki and Haruhi… They're not together yet… but they could be… It hurts to see all of them so happy. I know I should be happy for them and partly I am but then there's that other part that's always suffering and it makes being happy and supportive almost impossible and now it made me do something despicable… For fuck's sake I should be the emotionless and cold Shadow king who doesn't care about anything else other than what the clubs incomes are and how much profit we have made. How I wish that I could be that Shadow king and not this lovesick wreck…" _

Again a soft sigh escaped from Kyoya's lips. _"… I think that the best option for me is…to quit the host club… Yes, that's the best thing to do. I quit the club and I don't have to see them together. I just keep my distance and concentrate on school and work… After all I do have a company to run. I'll work hard so I don't have too much time to think about personal matters and after I finish school I can move away from here. Away from all the painful memories and hopefully time will at least dull this pain." _With these thoughts Kyoya slowly shifted to a dreamless sleep with an ache in his chest but determination in mind to get over this as best as he could. He would only concentrate on work and he wouldn't let anyone approach him ever again because love led only to heartache.

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Thank you for reading!

Love, Black


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